Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
they need to just BURY HIM!
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize