just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
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