You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
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