I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
