your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
