how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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