If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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