Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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