You just made me feel so damn special
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
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