can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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