Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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