i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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