1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
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