I feel great
I just peed on a car
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
