she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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