I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
