either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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