How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
