I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.