and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
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