this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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