do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
you didnt know i had herpes?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize
