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• (519): View more from Ontario

  and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.

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• (952): View more from Minnesota

  You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air

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• (425): View more from Washington

  Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.

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• (512): View more from Texas

  He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome

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• (949): View more from California

  You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.

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• (229): View more from Georgia

  Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.

  (1-937): View more from Ohio

  Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them

  (937): View more from Ohio

  Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.

  (1-937): View more from Ohio

  Sounds legit to me.

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.

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• (384): View more from

  So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.

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• (239): View more from Florida

  Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder

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• (385): View more from Utah

  I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving

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• (925): View more from California

  He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.

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