Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.

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  (407): Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer. http://tfl.nu/hnl7
  Replies (5) Good night (1653) Bad night (2947)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  you would pick up someone in the library

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  (502): you would pick up someone in the library http://tfl.nu/20m6
  Replies (20) Good night (3841) Bad night (576)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.

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  (267): My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester. http://tfl.nu/b6od
  Replies (2) Good night (1290) Bad night (3219)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"

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  (619): Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!" http://tfl.nu/5vjf
  Replies (35) Good night (5885) Bad night (8433)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"

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  (631): Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it" http://tfl.nu/tnve
  Replies (40) Good night (5377) Bad night (5186)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.

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  (316): I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina. http://tfl.nu/8zh1
  Replies (41) Good night (5975) Bad night (1702)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.

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  (303): Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron. http://tfl.nu/c12y
  Replies (4) Good night (1662) Bad night (1530)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.

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  (604): So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom. http://tfl.nu/yo38
  Replies (6) Good night (501) Bad night (2486)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.

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  (603): Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes. http://tfl.nu/6vyp
  Replies (4) Good night (415) Bad night (818)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night

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  (859): Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night http://tfl.nu/xjt9
  Replies (0) Good night (601) Bad night (428)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome

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  (443): let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome http://tfl.nu/i2ox
  Replies (3) Good night (439) Bad night (659)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway

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  (330): Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway http://tfl.nu/794f
  Replies (5) Good night (1191) Bad night (340)
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!

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  (925): You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here! http://tfl.nu/pvgq
  Replies (4) Good night (811) Bad night (390)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??

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  (716): Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again?? http://tfl.nu/md65
  Replies (4) Good night (342) Bad night (674)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."

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  (920): Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth." http://tfl.nu/xs9s
  Replies (1) Good night (630) Bad night (279)

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