I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
