You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Randomize
