Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
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