Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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