Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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