I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
and you fell through a lawn chair
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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