If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I just blew my weed a kiss
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
