So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize