real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I could fuck to npr.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
