So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
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