hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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