i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
