Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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