sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
