he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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