You're completely useless in the revolution.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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