so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Randomize