What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize