no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
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