lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
