I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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