I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Randomize
