she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
