So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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