Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
You are a genius and a whore.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize