is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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