I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
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